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... 這一次只不過是一個女人對另一個女人的同情，
但這絕不代表原諒。 | | |
| It is now December... and throughout this entire year I have written 4 entries... Is this year really not worth talking about? Or have I, myself, lost all words possible within me?
Those who read my entries might came to notice that 10 out of 10 entries have a rather slow rhythm. It is like as though you were listening to blues on a rainy day at a table next to a big window at a cafe'.
Then considering to that pattern does it mean that this year has been full of fast pace rhythms of happiness? Unfortunately, as much as I wish that this was the case, it is not.
Years before now, I tend to chase after the stars and tried to collect every single one of them to build my little world. Little did I know that back then, I had already built my own little kingdom without even realizing it.
2 years ago, I gave up on chasing after the stars and turned the sails to search for the moon and I was so certain that I was heading in the right direction.
Now it came to a point where I lost every single little one of those stars and it becomes so dark in the wild ocean that I couldn't even see the moon... Let alone, chasing after it.
I don't know where I had dropped my stars and I don't know how to look for them again. I am sailing around pointlessly and endlessly... I am officially lost and completely defeated. | | |
| This industry is not so premeditated, what I'm trying to say is I let quite a few opportunities flew by due to my own arrogance, It's not like; "Now I'm going to do publication. Now I'm going to do advertising. Now this is not going to give me what I assume it should."
I suppose I'll try out for everything that I can from now on. I don't believe that I have the luxury to choose or to eliminate, especially when I'm starting out, and certainly as a junior designer, I should go for what's available and then I hope to just learn as I go and build on that as they come.
Cause now I'm scared. I'm scared because I've lost my direction, simply as that.
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| So here I am... a 23 year old single woman with no financial security but with many life experiences behind me, did that mean nothing?
After all, heart breaking breakups are the hardest kind of wound, so... shouldn't there be some credit for enduring them?
And if not, how do you retain a sense of value when you have nothing concrete to show for it?
Cause at the end, it’s yet another failed relationship, when all you have left are more wounds and self out, you have to wonder... what's it all worth?
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| " To my mind there is nothing in life so delightful as that feeling of Relief, of Escape, and Absolute Freedom, which on experiences in a vast solitude, where man has perhaps never been, and has, at any rate, left no trace of his existence. "
One had told me that when the time comes in life... the moment when you feel like you could no longer breathe~
It is a signal from your soul that the energy stored in you is reaching to the very end and it is time to go and restore your energy...
... and the destination is... Patagonia.
A place known to be so spiritual... it almost seems like it will not only offer you a new source of energy, but would also purify your soul... | | |
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